Okay Geeks. I want to try something new today. In order to exercise AccessoryGeek’ Commandment #5, “a Geek communicates openly”, I would like to take this opportunity to express my sincere and honest opinion about some cell phone covers. We all know that cell phone covers are just as essential as owning a new phone, substantiated by two main reasons: protection and fashion. Given that protection is well provided with most cases, exhibiting trendy fashion for your phone is of utmost importance! There are some very chic covers out there in the market. However, there are many of which a designer seems to have “tried too hard” to make it stand out.  While some display just the right amount of flavor to ameliorate the look, some demonstrate chaos as if a baby puked on the canvas. Everyone has different artistic taste and standard. Today I would like to express mine. Welcome to an episode of FoodGeek’s choice of Top 5 Ugliest Cellphone Cases!

Blackberry Curve 8250/ Curve 8530 Hard Plastic Case – Pink Giraffe

Pink and purple is just not a good mix. Even though the title says “pink giraffe” it’s actually difficult to tell what it is with this obscure pattern and inappropriate mixture of colors. Definitely stands out – as one of the poorest design out there, considering that it’s a cell phone cover for a relatively new phone.  Very oddly mixed colors – uncomplimentary and lacking in any particular pattern. Can it be considered an optical illusion? I don’t’ think so, in my humble opinion, this is more like a headache. It exhibits very poor combination of colors. Seems like the designer tried too hard to stand out that he or she forgot to incorporate the very elementary concept of art. It says “Zebra meets mutation

Motorola Droid A855/ Milestone Hard Plastic Case – Turquoise/Black Zebra

Baskin Robbins’s very new flavor of chocolate chip mint for our perception, instead of our taste. Chocolate chip mint tastes good as an ice cream – not so much…for as a cell phone cover! The designer’s effort to incorporate zebra design is clearly shown. I guess it’s innovative in a sense that whoever designed it wanted to break away from the traditional black and white zebra color. Well, some things are better to be left as its original. This case definitely reflects that wish. Black and green color of zebra pattern invites confusion: Just what the heck is that suppose to be? Maybe designers should consider that sometimes, things are best to be left as it is.

Leopard Fur Flip Phone Cell Phone Case – Tan w/Black (FS)

Get noticed everywhere? Yeah, most definitely with this design, you will be noticed everywhere and everytime. It has been constructed by Homo habilis himself 2.3 to 1.4 million years ago at the beginning of the Pleistocene period. I am pretty sure that having animal fur designs like this were a popular fashion trend back then, but definitely not in this era. Once you put this case on your phone, you can make sure that your popularity level and social status will stoop down one level. Take your phone out having this case on, instantly you’ll be recognized – not because you look cool, but because of the purely absurd looking phone of yours. Who would buy stuff like these anyways? Well, I guess it still provides animal-like protection…

LG CE110 Nylon Case Cover – Hot Pink w/ Silver Trim

Well let’s just hope that this case at least serves the function of protecting your phone, because it definitely does not make the “right” fashion statement. If anything, the phone will look better without this case on. In comparison to food, this case is almost like onion rings – they don’t have any nutritional value and are bad for your health. Function-wise, it probably does the job in protecting your phone from scratches and abrasions. However, appearance-wise, it is detrimental. The mixture of bright pink and silver in this shape is hideous! Not to mention the case is shaped like a bathing suit over the phone. It almost looks like a person trying too hard to impress others, wearing a cheap bathing suit with a lack of any fashion mindset.

Sanyo 3100 Black Cyber Case

What does this image remind you of? Perhaps a soldier in a chemical warfare, wearing a gas mask and a backpack? I don’t know about you, but that’s the first thing that came to my mind when I saw this picture. This kind of case is very obsolete. It looks too tacky and has no style. Whoever owns this case definitely looks for function with zero consideration for the fashionable taste. Today, function itself is not enough – appropriate design is another factor that determines “good cell phone” case. Looking at this hideous case almost offends me. Well, as long as it satisfies whoever has this case, right?